It's pretty crazy to look back and realize that it has almost been a year since I wrote in my blog. Some may choose to look at that as a good thing and others may wonder why I ever stopped writing. I have felt the need to write for a while now but making it a priority has obviously not happened. Life has been busy between work, working out and finding time to enjoy myself. Up until this point every time I sat down to write it generally was structured around my grief journey and how I was handling each day but today my post is surrounded around some of the exciting things I am doing in my life and the learning that is occurring as I take those steps. I have figured out how to take my sadness and pain and transfer it into positive actions rather than just sitting in grief. I no longer let it overpower my thoughts instead I have found new techniques to remember my father while continuing to spread his power of love to the rest of the world. In helping others reach their goals I have found my passion, which I believe everyone knew was my path before I even began the career I have chosen. I am not perfect but I have made huge strides into living the life that I know my father would be proud of.
With that being said, most people that know me would agree that I have an extreme passion for working out and it's ultimately what led me years ago to the position I am in currently of being a personal trainer and sports performance coach. I absolutely love pushing people to new limits. The ability to see people reach new goals and watching them strive to be the best they can is one of the greatest feelings in the world. Hearing the words "I can't" come out of my clients mouths makes me work that much harder to prove to each of them that they can. I have learned that while people are working out you see a side of them that you may never see in their every day life. You see dedication to a specific task with an attitude of never giving up even if they fail they will get right back up and try again, and again, and again, until they accomplish the task you are asking of them. Not only do they strive for greatness for themselves, but they strive for those working out beside them and even more than that they strive to make me, their coach, proud. I continue to learn so much about fitness, working out, nutrition and what the body is capable of on any given day. I have witnessed what fear can do to a person and that while fear may be controlling the mind all they need is just one person to believe in them and care about their journey. That care for others is really just having compassion for every single person you come in contact with knowing that at any given moment you have the ability to forever change that persons life. For me, my avenue to most people is through fitness and I feel fortunate that I can impact lives in a healthy and positive manner.
Through fitness I have been introduced to some pretty incredible human beings. As I continue to surround myself around new groups of people one of the most exciting things to see is each persons passion. We may come from a different past, our stories may not match up perfectly if even at all, we may not be the same skin color or even the same gender and our personal goals may not match up but one common connection we all have is that we strive to be the best we can in order to break the barriers we have built for ourselves. However, one thing I have realized or maybe I should say one thing I know I struggle with is that we must open our eyes to those around us in times of need. Physical strength becomes even more powerful when you take advantage of those people surrounding you that want to build you up and inspire you to reach a new level of greatness. Each individual helps create a culture and that culture becomes a driving force behind the challenges faced by any one person who understands how difficult it is to push the body to its limits. Understanding someones goal is not necessary, what is necessary is the ability to understand what it takes mentally and physically to never stop until that goal is achieved. Alone a person can only push them self as far as they are willing to push but in a group or a pack of like-minded individuals, suddenly that same person is able to dig deeper and not give up until they have exhausted all ability to try. Giving up without an attempt to succeed is a sign of weakness and as humans we hate feeling weak. Even more than just personally feeling weak we hate other people seeing our weakness, vulnerability is not our friend.
You can definitely consider me a gym rat, I can spend hours and hours in a gym with no care in the world. I love to push my body to its limits and fortunately I have always been someone that could push myself without anyone around. In the past I have found it hard to workout in a group unless it was a class style workout where I knew I could push myself and help push others at the same time. I decided to take action on a goal that I had for myself but never took the steps towards, known as the sport of powerlifting. In order to reach new personal records there is no other choice than to allow others to be apart of that journey, so for once I branched out to find someone that could teach me how to be a Powerlifter. I promised myself that once I set my mind to it I would take whatever steps necessary to reach my goal. In the process I found my coach Gracie V who immediately believed that my goal was not only possible but that I would fall in love with a sport I knew very little about. I walked into California Elite Training Center and never felt so out of place in my life. The outgoing, loud, and fun girl that most know me as became this shy and quiet individual that felt so uncomfortable. I started questioning if I could ever fit in but within minutes I realized that I was in my version of a gym heaven. Slowly I began meeting all these people, one person after another I would introduce myself and for once it wasn't guys, it was a group of women with all different backgrounds but with the same goal.
I have now been powerlifting for a little over a month and slowly I am feeling stronger and stronger. Not only am I physically stronger but mentally stronger. I am surrounded around a pack of people that are not only passionate about reaching goals but they are also extremely passionate about others reaching their goals. One minute I find myself frustrated or excited about my performance and the next I am screaming and yelling at a fellow lifter to motivate them to not give up. I am becoming more and more comfortable with the person I am. These ladies remind me every single day that I am number one and that if I don't take care of myself I won't be any good for anyone else. As a group we pick each other up and on the tough days no matter how alone we may feel we are as far from alone as possible. I am also learning to dig deep and find that passion that is buried inside of me and for once in my life I want to truly do something for myself. I will not allow myself to give up on this journey. As long as I continue to give everything I have I know that with the help of this pack I will not fail. Come April 30th, when I step into that gym for meet day I want to say that I did everything I could and that no matter what the outcome is on that day this is only the beginning.
Remember that your goals matter and that you have everything that you need inside of you at this exact time. Remove the statement "I can't" and believe that you can. Decide what goal you want to achieve, make a commitment to yourself to take whatever steps necessary to reach that goal, and you will succeed.
Always stay humble, and never let fear hold you back!